Off Days

I’ve had a bad lower back for almost as long as I can remember. I’m sure that if I went to a chiropractor or a physical therapist they could help me…but I haven’t, so every so often, something happens and my back gets all out of whack. Well, that “something” happened on Monday when we were at the beach. It was simple enough, and if you weren’t close to me you would’ve never known anything had happened. I was walking towards Zoe, who was sitting in a chair, and there was a slight dip in the sand, which I stepped in and I could literally feel the left side of my back pull out of alignment. It was painful. I could still walk, bend over, and in general, function…but every so often I would get a twinge that felt like a knife being jammed into my back. Later that day I was sitting on my friend Kristin’s couch and I uncrossed my feet. Pain flooded my senses and for a brief moment, I couldn’t move. I, ever so slowly, found my way off the couch so that I could meet Brad downstairs. As I limped towards the elevator Kristin told me that I looked like a crippled person. She was right. Lower back pain is no fun. It was in that moment I decided that I wasn’t going to the gym on Tuesday.

And so, today has been spent exactly like every single day before I started this journey. I drank absolutely no water. For the most part, I’ve been sitting on the couch all day long. I drank entirely too much Diet Coke. I forgot to eat lunch. My joints are stiff. My energy is low. My motivation is nonexistent. I’m still in the same clothes that I woke up in.

It’s amazing how much waking up with Brad, and leaving first thing in the morning for the gym has changed my daily patterns. I do things all day long. I’m up and down and all over the place. But, when I’m sitting on my couch all day…Brad does everything. Everything. The days that I go to the gym I almost never watch the TV during the day. Today? My tv has been on since 8am. It’s currently 9:30pm. That’s over 12 hours of straight TV being on in my house. How completely ridiculous is that?

Ugh. It is an off day in every sense of the word. I find that every day that I’m not in the gym is an off day. Why is that? I wonder. You would think that even if I can’t go to the gym because my back is out of whack, I would make even more of an effort to keep the rest of my “program” on track. But just the opposite is true. I let go of everything. It’s as if the gym, at this stage, is my anchor. When I’m at the gym, working my body, I’m conscious of my body all day long. Every decision that I make, in regards to food and drink, is filtered through a workout mentality. Will this help my workout? Will I pay for this in the gym tomorrow? But give me just one day away from the gym, and all that goes to hell in a handbasket. It’s mildly disgusting to me.

My back is better now, so you’d better believe that I’m going to be at the gym first thing tomorrow morning. Two hour workout, here I come.

Does this ever happen to you? Off days where absolutely nothing productive happens towards your journey of weight-loss?